Pink with Envy wedding bridesmaids

Will you be my bridesmaid?

Recently engaged? Trying to come up with the perfect wedding party? Curious about the proper duties and the ins and outs of being a bridesmaid?

Will you be my bridesmaid? - Pink with Envy Event Planning ServicesHave no fear, etiquette expert Emily Post’s tried and true answers still apply today!

Many brides already know who they want to be a part of their special day before the question is popped and the ring is on the finger. So how do you know who is right for the job? Many brides feel pressure about picking the right group of attendants. According to Emily Post, it is proper and customary to ask your attendants within six months of your engagement (if it is longer) and three months (if it is a shorter engagement).

Being a part of a wedding not only requires a monetary commitment but a time commitment as well. You should also think about your relationship with a person. Don’t feel pressured to have someone in your wedding just because you were in theirs. Does your fiancé have a sister? Consider asking her to be a part of your wedding party. It not only allows the opportunity for the two of you to grow closer but is a gracious gesture. You also don’t need to have the same amount of bridesmaids as groomsmen. Neither you nor your fiancé need the pressure of asking someone just to ask and have an even number, again it is a commitment for that person as well.


What are the responsibilities of the maid or matron of honor and bridesmaids?

The maid or matron of honor is the bride’s right-hand woman. She assists in selecting the bridesmaids’ attire, lends a hand in assisting with addressing invitations and place cards. She also organizes the bridesmaids’ luncheon as well as the gift to the bride from her bridal party. She is also the witness to the signing of the marriage certificate. She helps in day-of events such as assisting the bride with her gown, veil, train and her bouquet. Emily Post considers this role one of the highest responsibilities. Be sure you select wisely.

The bridesmaids responsibilities are more general and include attending fittings, parties, rehearsal and the rehearsal dinner. Emily Post states that when committing to a wedding understand your financial responsibility. Bridesmaids and the maid or matron of honor pay for their own dress, alterations, shoes, accessories, travel expenses and a group present for the bride and groom. The couple can arrange for the lodging of their bridal party – it is nice to be able to cover this expense for them but more and more we see the bridal party taking on this expense too.

All in all, there is a lot of time and money involved when someone is asked to be in a bridal party. Couples should take this into consideration and make sure to give a lot of thought to the people they would like to have standing next to them on their big day. Make your selection wisely and try to include those that want to help you have one of the best days of your life.

For more tips, ideas and etiquette answers we encourage you to visit Emily Post’s website at


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